{"id":465,"date":"2017-03-14T12:56:16","date_gmt":"2017-03-14T12:56:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/?p=465"},"modified":"2021-06-03T13:12:06","modified_gmt":"2021-06-03T11:12:06","slug":"iskam-da-izjiveya-jivota-si-naobratno","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/iskam-da-izjiveya-jivota-si-naobratno\/","title":{"rendered":"Ich m\u00f6chte mein n\u00e4chstes Leben r\u00fcckw\u00e4rts leben"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Sean Morey<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Ich m\u00f6chte mein n\u00e4chstes Leben r\u00fcckw\u00e4rts leben. Indem ich auftauche, l\u00f6se ich das Problem des Todes. Dann wache ich in einem Pflegeheim auf und f\u00fchle mich jeden Tag besser. Sie schmei\u00dfen mich raus, weil ich zu gesund bin, um dort zu sein, ich gehe meine Rente abholen, und an meinem ersten Arbeitstag bekomme ich eine goldene Uhr, und sie schmei\u00dfen eine Party f\u00fcr mich. Ich habe 40 Jahre gearbeitet, bis ich zu jung war, um meinen Ruhestand zu genie\u00dfen.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Ich feiere, trinke Alkohol und lebe verschwenderisch, dann gehe ich ins Gymnasium. Dann kommt die Grundschule, ich verwandle mich in ein Kind und spiele den ganzen Tag. Ich habe keine Verantwortung, ich werde ein Baby und es ist Zeit zu geb\u00e4ren. Anschlie\u00dfend schwimme ich 9 Monate unter luxuri\u00f6sen Spa-\u00e4hnlichen Bedingungen mit Zentralheizung und unbegrenztem Zimmerservice. Meine Wohnung wird jeden Tag gr\u00f6\u00dfer und endlich: Voila! \u2013 Ich beende wie ein Orgasmus!\u201c \ud83d\ude42<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ich m\u00f6chte mein n\u00e4chstes Leben r\u00fcckw\u00e4rts leben. Indem ich auftauche, l\u00f6se ich das Problem des Todes. Dann wache ich in einem Pflegeheim auf und f\u00fchle mich jeden Tag besser. Sie schmei\u00dfen mich raus, weil ich zu gesund bin, um dort zu sein, ich gehe meine Rente abholen, und an meinem ersten Arbeitstag bekomme ich eine goldene Uhr, und sie schmei\u00dfen eine Party f\u00fcr mich.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":464,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[73,4,3],"tags":[33,30,13,52,35],"class_list":["post-465","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-misli","category-madrost","category-pat-kam-shtastieto","tag-33","tag-30","tag-13","tag-52","tag-35"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/465","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=465"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/465\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/464"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=465"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=465"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flow.bg\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=465"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}